free trial

I signed up for the free 7-day trial on match. When I originally registered a couple days ago, I merely did the free profile. But with a free profile, you can’t see the people who email you. All you see is “you have 5 emails” mysteriously taunting you. Sure, you can see the people who have winked at you, and you can wink back. But, that’s where the free perks end. That’s kind of unfulfilling. I want to see emails. I want to see the dashing, charming, intelligent men who have taken the time to do more than wink: they put pen to paper (so to speak) and actually used words and sentences. And if I’m lucky, correct punctuation! Oh match.com, you tease me with this free profile!

And, as The Comic said, if I’m going to commit to this experiment, then I have to commit and actually pay the 41 bucks. But as a broke student, 41 bucks is 164 packets of Ramen. That’s like 4 months worth of meals! That’s a lot of meals! He’s right though. If I’m going to commit, then I have to shell out the money. The problem is, I lack follow through. How do I know I won’t lose interest in this whole going on-line thing, checking who’s available, sending them a wink, sending an email, responding to a wink, responding to an email…. I’m tired already! So I decided to compromise and signed up for the 7 day free trial! It’s like match was made for me! Sure, it sounds cool today, but in 7 days, will I still be amused? If I am, cool, it automatically enrolls me. If I’m not, no sweat: simply un-enroll. Easy enough.

So with my 7-day free trial signed up, I decided to look at my emails. One of the guys had pictures of himself as a professional bodybuilder. I’m talking small blue Speedo and years upon years worth of muscles thanks to steroids. Next. One guy was 45. Next. One guy was practically illiterate (I know I’m an anal-retentive English major, but come on…if you’re trying to meet the girl of your dreams then use spell-check!) One guy was just blah. There was nothing really wrong with him. Just blah.

But the last guy. The last guy wins, hands down. I almost want to reply, because I admire the effort he put in. I almost want to turn my blog over to this guy, cause he is very creative. Well, in a “he doesn’t really make sense, but I appreciate the thought” kind of way. This is a direct quote (I seriously can’t make this stuff up!):

“Subject: Incredible, intriguing...

...induces increased iambic intimacy in Ikea incandescents. I know, my attempt at an alliteration is about 1k light years removed from world domination. It's too bad we live so far apart. Anyways, I just wanted to say hello! Happy trails.”

Yes, it’s too bad we don’t live closer. Cause THAT’S why we wouldn’t hang out. (Is there a rolling-the-eyes smiley?) Again, I appreciate the effort, but…come on!! Match.com, you have 6.5 days left to impress me.