Jacob from Twilight

I was casually watching E! News tonight (if it has the word “news” in the title, it counts as informative journalism). I was actually working on printing out resumes and stuff for an interview which I have tomorrow, and just had the tv on in the background. Everyone knows that the best way to prepare for a law clerk position with the District Attorney’s office is by watching a show about the various goings-on in Hollywood!

Anyway, the show was about the kid who plays Jacob in the Twilight series. I don’t know his name, and I’m too lazy to look it up. I do know, however, that Jacob is the werewolf (by the way, I am definitely on Team Jacob! I think a werewolf could EASILY take a vampire any day! Now, get a zombie in the mix, and the whole dynamic changes). The story was about what this actor looks for in a girlfriend. Apparently he’s single, and the reporter asked what kind of girl catches his attention. I actually am embarrassed to say that I found myself listening attentively and making ticks on my mental checklist of which qualities I had. Friendly girls? I’m friendly. Outgoing girls? I’m outgoing! Smart and ambitious? Check and check! Oh my gosh! I’m a perfect match!

On what planet would I ever date a guy like him (read: famous actor)? Don’t get me wrong, he’s very good looking. I just can’t picture a real scenario where we would ever be at the same place at the same in a way which would allow us to meet. Does he live in my apartment complex? Probably not. Does he go to the same 24-hour fitness? I doubt it. Does he hang out at my school’s library? Ok, I don’t either, but that’s entirely beyond the point! I hate to admit that I fell prey to the vicious reporters at E! who get their kicks on making regular, average people think that actors are regular, average people who date regular, average people. This kind of belief was cute when I was 11 and thought that I had a chance with Edward Furlong (Terminator 2 was my favorite movie at 11. And don’t even get me started on how cute he was in Aerosmith’s Living on the Edge video!) I don’t care if he puts his pants on one leg at a time; we are different types of people. Not saying he’s better or anything: he’s just different. And I'm sure the leggy blonde model he ends up with will be friendly, outgoing, smart and ambitious. (Though, I would challenge her to spell "ambitious".)

And if you’re not different, and are in fact the kind of guy who dates nerdy law students, then I dare you to prove it, guy who plays Jacob on Twilight.