The other night New Marine and I were talking, and he said that he would like me even if I gained a hundred pounds, cause he’s attracted to my mind and personality first and foremost. I told him that that was awesome, cause it gave me the go ahead to stop working out and start eating cake. Mmmm cake. I told him I was almost antagonistic to call his bluff. “I bet you WON’T like me if I gain 100 pounds.” But, then I realized that while I might win and be right, then I’d be 100 pounds bigger and single. That won’t do me any good. So, it sucks that I want to call b.s. on that, but really I can’t. It’s like the safest thing he could have ever said, cause he knows I won’t do it no matter how much I like cake.
But, lately I’ve been wondering if this whole “long distance” thing is really the right choice for me. It sucks. It really, really sucks. I mean, he’s 3 hours ahead. So, when I’m out of class at 6 and want to talk, he’s already going to bed. And when he wants to call me in the morning on the way in to work, I’m sleeping. And I will kill him if he wakes me up. Ok, that’s not necessarily true. I answer most times when he texts me between 2 and 8 a.m. Monday nights I silence my phone, cause I have to be up early for school, so I don’t want to be up even earlier with a phone call. And, I don’t want to tell him that, cause I don’t want him to stop calling at all. I mean, I do like waking up to good morning texts. They’re sweet. But, it just feels like him being far away really sucks. I mean, maybe it’ll be better after he comes out here, cause I’ll have memories. Right now it’s almost like he’s not real, cause we haven’t actually met. That makes it really hard to not start thinking about the Marine when I’m bummed about the distance with New Marine cause I have actual memories with him. I mean, I’m not saying I miss the Marine (ok, I do a little bit), I’m just saying it’s hard not to think of him when I’m not completely ecstatic with this current situation. New Marine is pretty awesome, don’t get me wrong. He’s attentive and sweet. (Though, I’m beginning to wonder if everything is on his time. I mean, he calls me when it’s convenient for me, or texts me when it’s convenient for him. Though, I can’t be mad that he has to go to bed early cause he has to get up early. But on Friday he went out and got wasted with his friend and called me at like 1am. I’m happy he’s calling, but it would have been way more convenient if he’d called me at 8pm when I was a) awake, b)coherent c) not prone to being annoyed that he was out getting wasted with his friends while I was at home in bed.) I dunno…maybe I’m just looking for a problem, since he seems otherwise perfect. Maybe I’m scared of finding a guy who could be perfect for me? Maybe I’m just antsy and fed up with waiting for it to be April 17th when he’ll be here!
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WOW!! Ok, reading your blogs makes me, as a man, feel better about not understanding women. It's no wonder we feel we can never win! In any case, I hope things work out with you and New M, but stop thinking about Old M!
ReplyDeleteWhat?! Brian. Women are totally easy to understand: be nice and we're happy. Give us attention and we're happy. Randomly buy us flowers and we're happy. Be thoughtless, and we're upset. Seems pretty straightforward to me. :-)
ReplyDeleteLOL,
ReplyDeleteGood try SG! You are upset with NM because he calls and texts you on his schedule, instead of yours. Well, dang, he's in the military!!! His whole life has a rigid schedule that is dictated to him. I am actually impressed that the guy dedicates as much time as he does to you. Its actually pretty impressive! And as for the cake question and you gaining weight. There is NO right answer for a guy. If he says "of course I would love you if you gained a 100lbs." You won't believe him. If he says "Hell no, lose some weight cow!" You for sure won't like him.
LOL, Like I said. Women are difficult! :)
Oh..don't give me that military excuse BS. The night in particular which stands out as being on his schedule was him being wasted and calling me at like 1am my time (4am his time!!). Or..texting me that he's going to bed so he can't talk..but it's like "what have you been doing for the last 5 hours since you were off work??" No..I'm super impressed that he talks to me as much as he does too. But, it's not like he's doing me a favor. He likes talking to me that much, and gets sad when we can't/don't talk. He likes a lot of attention. And..about the weight thing..I'm actually planning a post in my head about that very issue- a more in depth look at exactly what you pointed out: how hard it is for a guy when it comes to his lady friend's weight. :-)
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