Playa

Today was study day. The It Couple and I outlined for a class. We had hoped to get through 200 pages in 2 hours. We got through 73. But, that’s 73 more than we had earlier. So, it’s all good. I’m sure we’ll get ‘er done. Then It Boy left and Personal Trainer came over. I cooked dinner for them. Yes, you read correctly. I cooked dinner. It turned out deliciously too! Whole wheat pasta with vodka sauce, garlic bread and salad. Can you say gourmet?? Granted, none of it was homemade. I mean, if it were It Girl’s house, she’d have made the sauce from scratch. Probably grew her own tomatoes and made her own pasta too. But, store bought is fine with me. I think it turned out well. We worked out earlier with the Personal Trainer doing some cardio. He came back over after his other sessions. He’s pretty chill to hang out with. I like him sometimes, but I don’t know if I feel the spark. Though, according to He’s Just Not That Into You, the spark is something women create because they like drama. I like drama as much as the next girl, but I think the spark is real. Sometimes you just feel the spark, and there is no drama. Drama is what kills the spark. Thinking back on my past few dudes, it was drama that killed the spark for sure. Most of my past relationships, including relationships. I’ve ended a few friendships because the girl and/or guy was too drama. No more drama in my life. Check please. So, tonight while we were all hanging out, I got a call from Lance Armstrong. I couldn’t answer obviously. I just texted him after Personal Trainer left and told him I didn’t know if 10 is too late to call, but that he could call me back whenever. Some people go to bed by 10, so I didn’t want to be rude. Though, how a text is better than a call if it is too late, I’m not sure. Maybe his ringer is quieter for texts? Maybe I should have just called. Oh well. Also, this new dude who’s been emailing me emailed me. We’ll call him Marshall, as he’s a Federal Air Marshall. How hot is that?? And why am I all of a sudden attracted to men who have something to do with airplanes? First an Air Traffic Controller. Now a Federal Air Marshall? But seriously. How HOT is that?? He was in the Navy for 10 years. That’s pretty hot too. And, he got my random jokes on eharmony. In the “tell something else about yourself” (or whatever it is) part, I wrote “I love lamp.” So, his first email to me said “I just recently moved to the OC from San Diego, which in case you didn’t know is German for whale’s vagina.” I’m stoked that he got my quote! A few guys had to ask what it was from. That’s my hint that I will not be connecting with them. I responded to that saying “Wow. I thought that the translation had been lost to scientists hundreds of years ago.” And, as It Girl thinks, a guy who uses the “v” word in a first email is a keeper. I had to ask her if it’s weird that we think that way, cause most girls would probably be offended. I guess I’m just that classy. I think that if a guy doesn’t have the sense of humor of a 12 year old, and doesn’t have his mind in the gutter will not get along with me and my friends. But, it’s funny that while I’m with Personal Trainer, all these other dudes were contacting me. Is this what it feels like to be popular? I mean, I didn’t want to say anything, but, I’m kind of a hot commodity. A real big deal. Ok, I’m kidding. I only played one for Halloween. Sometimes I actually wonder why people think I’m funny, or respond to me at all. In the email, I also referred to the fact that under occupation he said “Government”. I said “Your profile says your occupation is "government". Are you the entire government, cause that sounds pretty hectic and full of paperwork. However, if you are the whole government, I've been meaning to talk to you about potholes on the streets.” Yeah, that’s one of those things that I probably should have actually thought about before I hit the send button. But, he still responded. So, maybe he does really get me afterall. We’ll see. He’s in New York right now cause he is, you know, marshalling. (Points for emailing me while in New York.) He said he’d be back tomorrow. I’m kind of interested to see what happens. Did I mention how incredibly hot he is? I bet stewardesses through themselves at him. Not good, cause I’m kind of a jealous person. I say I’ll work on that, but I probably won’t. How do you work on that anyway? Are there like word problems I can do? Is there a workbook? I mean, when I had to work on learning Spanish, I had a workbook and practice problems. Match the word with the picture. The word “mesa” gets matched with the picture of the table. Done. Does the phrase “jealous b*tch” get matched with a picture of me, and I’ve learned? One time last year this really annoying 1L was all over Manic Depressive Alcoholic (MDA) at this school Tiki Cruise. I let it go most of the night. I figured he wasn’t reacting to her, and was actually really, really annoyed by her, so I’d let him handle it. But, at the end, I’d just had it. So when she grabbed the hat off his head, I got pissed. I took it back, in a fairly aggressive way. Then, when we were walking away, she grabbed his ass. Uh oh. I turned around “I’ll punch you slutty 1L!” Like, I literally had to be restrained. MDA had to hold me back. My girlfriends had to hold me back. People had to get me to walk away. I’ve never been in a fight, but I could have easily kicked that chick’s ass. MDA thought it was kind of funny that I went crazy. We ended up fighting about something else that night, but it wasn’t even over the fact that I threatened to beat up some lame chick. Again, I’m extremely classy. I think it’s kind of hilarious in retrospect. But man, this can now be admitted to a court of law as a hearsay exception: statement against self-interest. Hopefully the statute of limitations for attempted assault has run out! Point is: maybe I need to a) control my jealous tendencies; b) …. I don’t know if there is a b. This may be a 1 moral-of-the-story story. Well, here’s to hoping that something happens with the Marshall that can even lead to my being jealous of him and other chicks.